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Being Overdue

I lay in the ultrasound room looking at this small person I had created who was already 12 weeks cooking. I was told ’20th June 2017, estimated due date’. I was so excited, I text all my family the date, wrote it on every calendar I could find and started my weekly countdown.

Fast forward 28 weeks to the 20th June, one of the hottest days that England has ever seen, and I’m still sat on the sofa like a big sweaty whale with not even a twinge. But at least my phone has gone off again so I can tell the 10th person today that no there are no signs.

Although currently only four days overdue, my patience is wearing thin on having to explain the current status of my cervix. I’m considering a group message with the following answers:
No, there is still no sign of the baby, if there was a baby you would know.
Yes, my insides are obviously too comfortable ( ha ha ha, hilarious the first time)
Oh you’re busy on Wednesday? I’ll make sure it doesn’t make an appearance then.
You’re free next Saturday between 11-12 for cuddles? Course let me push it out before then to suit your schedule.

Yes I’ve tried home remedies, thanks for asking again.
Oh you had sex then went into labour? Please tell me that story again as It’s obviously scientifically proven.

It’s annoying you waiting for me to go into labour? Well f**k me, please tell me how I can make this easier for you!

Now don’t get me wrong, I appreciate the excitement from friends and family, but telling a frustrated, emotional and extremely uncomfortable pregnant person with something the size of a pumpkin inside her, to ‘hurry up’ is not the safest move in the book!

So I apologise to all the inconvenience I am causing to going overdue. Maybe an eviction notice might help next time?

Taken from my blog:

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