I’m always so open on here about my experiences with motherhood including how difficult I’ve found the adjustment. The last couple of weeks I’ve found myself checking out. Going through the motions of the day. I felt numb and detached which at times were really frightening. But totally normal.
I’ve got a 10 month old, I’m getting married in a month, we’ve just sold our house (and at the time we had no where to move to) and I had also just returned to work. On top of all that Alfie’s sleep had totally gone out the window so I was majorly sleep deprived. My poor brain was at complete capacity and as a way of coping had just stopped processing feelings.
I was sat feeding Alfie and remember having no concept of time. Feeling so numb that I knew I needed to reach out to someone. I was so scared that they would judge me but I was so wrong. I spoke to my other half and a couple of friends about how I was feeling and I felt instantly reassured.
Of course how I was feeling was normal. Look at how much I’m dealing with.
So to anyone who is sat at home reading this feeling overwhelmed I see you. I see your juggling act. Do not feel guilty. It doesn’t make you less of a parent. It makes you brave for acknowledging it and dealing with it.
I will always listen without judgement.