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AITA: Refused To Stop Husband Touching My Bump

The etiquette surrounding touching and personal space varies between cultures.

For some cultures, it's frowned upon to show public displays of affection, and for some, this may include the father of an unborn baby stroking or touching mum's bump in front of others, even if married. This may cause conflict in certain situations - one woman took to Reddit to share just that.

Married to a non-Muslim 'outsider', the poster's 'conservative Muslim' family have voiced their displeasure that her husband strokes her baby bump in front of her family. She notes that he seems to do it 'instinctively' without thinking, and that she is refusing to stop him despite her family demanding that she talks to her husband about it.

She's asked the Reddit 'AITA' (am I the asshole) board, is she the asshole for not stopping her husband from touching her bump despite the discomfort of her family? Read her post below...


Read the full post here - credit to Reddit.

What was the general consensus?

The vast majority of readers voted the poster 'NTA' (not the asshole) in this very awkward situation. Many noted that it's absolutely acceptable on a cultural level to feel uncomfortable with certain levels of personal touching between men and women in front of others, but pointed out that this is a couple who are expecting their own baby, and that perhaps the level of outrage is not relative to simply stroking a baby bump absent-mindedly! Others agreed and also pointed out that the poster's family should perhaps take into account that he's from a different culture, and that embracing his wife's growing baby bump is perhaps normal to him, rather than him behaving in an intentionally offensive manner. The top rated comment was...

"NTA. Seems like the issue really stems from them not liking the fact that you married an "outsider" and will find any excuse to find offense." Another reader agreed, adding "NTA! It just sounds like he’s trying to feel connected to his child. As long as you’re okay with the physical affection, then nobody else’s opinion matters."

Our verdict...

Overall, this is a very sensitive topic and we're fully understanding of cultural differences! However, fundamentally, it is down to what the expectant mum is comfortable with. If she's happy and at ease with her husband showing affection in this way (and it seems to come very naturally to him), then that is all that matters. 

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