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AITA: Won't Convince Sister To Let Family See Her Baby

When you go through labour, you hope with all your heart that you have a strong support system round you to help you get through it.

One Mum to be unfortunately had to go through it alone as her husband was deployed. Her labour had started at her Mums birthday party and was accused of taking the day away from her. Her sister took to Reddits AITA (Am I The Asshole?) board after family blamed her for not being able to see the newborn.

Read the full thread below...

"Okay so about a week ago my J(16F) sister K(20F) gave birth to her precious baby girl A. She went into labor unexpectedly on our narcissistic mother’s 40th birthday during her party. K’s boyfriend was deployed so he wasn’t able to attend. K’s water broke mid way through the party but when K tried to tell our mother and new husband they said K was just trying to take away her day. Everyone else at the party just brushed her off. I, having witnessed it all offered to take K to the hospital. We got to the hospital about 30 minutes after her water had broke. Within the hour my beautiful niece was born. She was even named after me. K posted a picture of me holding A as her baby announcement. Text came flooding in asking when our family could meet the baby. K was having none of it she told everyone included our mom and step dad that they were not to see the baby because no one wanted to help her. Soon after they had spoke to K my phone was blowing up with texts and calls from our mother telling me to talk to K to change her mind about seeing A. She said it was her birthday and they she didn’t think was actually in labor. I told her no that everyone needed to respect K’s decision. She along with a bunch of other family members are calling me the a$$hole for not trying to change my sisters mind right after giving birth. I feel like I might be the A hole because everyone was drinking and preoccupied at the party and my sister had just gave birth and was pretty emotional that she could’ve been just been making a decision without thinking. So AITA?"

Read the full Reddit thread here


What was the general consensus?

The poster was voted NTA (Not The Asshole). One of the top comments said:

"NTA. The best way to support your sister is to honour her wishes right now aboit this. If family couldn’t bother stopping their party to support her, I can only imagine how hurt she is. Her baby, her rules."

While another commented:

"NTA. Your sister was in labor. I was a few years older than her when my first was born, my husband was holding my hand, and I was still terrified. I can only imagine how awful it must have been to be 20, terrified, my spouse deployed, and my family basically accusing me of being a drama queen and insisting a birthday party was more important than making sure I was ok. OF course she doesn't want to see them, and that's her right. Make sure she gets support, including mental health evals. With that level of stress, she's at higher risk for post partum depression."

Our Verdict...

Going through labour while your husband is away working must be so hard emotionally. You definitely need a good support system round you to get you through. Unfortunately this family really let down the expectant Mother. We're happy, she at the very least, had her sister by her side during one of the biggest days of her life. All the sister can do is respect her sisters wishes and hope the family can somehow make it up to her, but it is not her job to fight on their behalf. 

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