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AITA: Refused Mum of 7 My Elevator

Whether you're a parent or not, most people loathe overly entitled parents who think that the world owes them a living.

Imagine thinking that giving birth entitles you to be obnoxious and demanding, and makes your own needs somehow more important than those of non-parents!

One perturbed neighbour took to the Reddit AITA (Am I The Asshole) board to ask, are they out of line for refusing to get out of a lift (or elevator, depending on where you live) to make space for a mother and her chaotic brood of SEVEN, after being rudely demanded to do so? We were pretty mortified by the story they regaled.

Read the full post below...

"A neighbour of mine has 7 children and they are all under the age of 9. I have seen her many times, and she always demands people take the next elevator because “she has kids who need to get home.” She has physically shoved into the elevators and forced people out, including my elderly father.

I was on my way home from work - I take public transit - and she was on the bus with all kids. They were screaming and running up and down the aisle; basically making such a scene that the driver asked her to have the kids sit down before they get hurt. Sure enough, one of the kids was spinning around one of the poles and bumped her head as we were going over the train tracks near my place and started screaming. She looked like she was physically okay, no blood, not even a red mark, but she screeched the rest of the ride to the building.

I was first in the building and hit the elevator button. She came in with her double stroller and her gaggle of children running around her as I stepped into the elevator and held the door for her. She told me that I would have to get out and wait for the next one. I said “excuse me?” She heavy sighed at me and said “my stroller won’t fit in with you in here. Get out and take the next one.” I refused, saying I would make myself as tiny as I could but I was staying in the elevator. She became irate, pointed at her kids and said “do you see what I’m dealing with here?!” I said I understood that it’s overwhelming but I had worked a long day and I needed to get home. I said “in or out, because I’m going now.” She pulled her stroller and kids out, calling me an asshole the entire time. A few people were waiting behind her and got in with me. Two began thanking me for standing up to her because she does this “all the time,” but the other one called me an asshole for not being sympathetic to her situation.

I don’t think people should have to make constant accommodations for people just because they have kids, especially when they’re rude and demanding. But AITA here?

EDIT: People are concerned with the way that this woman has treated my father. She did not physically touch him. He was in the elevator and she pushed her stroller in, waved her arms and yelled at him to get out several times. Because he’s hearing impaired, he was very confused and only knew that she was yelling at him and he got off the elevator. HAD she put her hands on him, charges would have been filed."

Read the full thread here on Reddit.

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angry

What was the general consensus?

To absolutely no surprise on our part, this poster was voted NTA (Not The Asshole), leaping on to defend the poster and assure them that they did not do anything wrong. The top rated comment was...

"NTA - I am soooooooo sick of entitled parents. Just because you breed does NOT entitle you to special treatment."

Our verdict...
 
Wow. We genuinely struggle to understand where people find the audacity and confidence to so brazenly treat other people like this, expecting them to give in because they feel that their status as a parent (of a lot of children) somehow gives them priority. We're pleased to say that the parents in our online community, especially those with larger families, are all super polite and conscientious people who were horrified when we shared this story with them! It definitely takes an incredible lack of self awareness to think that this is ok.
 
Is it acceptable politely ask for help if you're struggling with solo parenting in public? Absolutely! Most reasonable people would be totally fine to help out where they can, if asked with good manners and not expected to bend over backwards for you purely because you have kids. But is it acceptable to be rude, demanding, and then abusive when you don't get your own way? Never. The poster did the right thing and we hope that it taught her a lesson...
 

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